Arguments may flare up around perceived disconnection or distance, even if no intentional harm was intended. For instance, “I just needed a night to myself. It wasn’t because I’m losing interest or plan to break up with you.”  The partner may sometimes feel “smothered” or lose a sense of space because the anxiously attached person is requesting closeness or frequent check-ins that don’t match the partner’s cadence.

Loneliness in a relationship doesn’t always mean love is gone—it’s often a sign that the relationship needs emotional tending and intentional care. Just as physical health requires nourishment and attention, emotional connection needs ongoing investment to thrive. With awareness, openness, and a commitment to change, couples can move from disconnection to closeness again. Your emotional needs are valid, and tending to them can transform your relationship into a place of mutual care, intimacy, and emotional safety.

Healthy relationships thrive when both partners can hold the complexity of I didn’t mean to and it still hurt. True intimacy grows in the space where we take responsibility for our impact, even when our intentions were loving. Over time, this practice builds trust, safety, and a deeper sense of being known.

Staying connected in the digital age takes effort. It means choosing presence over performance. It means being more curious than reactive. And it means remembering that the person beside you is not just a placeholder for your attention, but someone who longs to be seen, felt, and cherished.

Many women think their body is “broken” and are filled with shame that they cannot carry a pregnancy to term but as the research shows, sperm also has a role to play. Reproductive health is not only the responsibility of the person who becomes pregnant. Men have an important role to play. Their health and choices impact outcomes as well.Their health is equally important for the health of the pregnancy and the child. Let’s remember that pregnancy is a partnership.

Sometimes, holding space means also knowing when to call in backup. Whether it’s a therapist, a support group, or a trusted friend, don’t hesitate to suggest (or seek) additional help. You’re not failing by doing so—you’re honoring the complexity of being human.

Back in my work with breast cancer survivors, this often meant helping participants find therapists or clinicians who understood the nuances of their identities. Everyone deserves care that sees the whole person. If you're unsure where to begin, a referral from a trusted professional can go a long way.

Instead of scheduling sex, consider scheduling time for erotic connection—which could mean anything from sensual touch, to taking a bath together, to lying in bed and fantasizing without any goal. The difference? Spaciousness. Curiosity. Freedom to explore without the demand to perform.

We still live in a culture that prefers clear boxes—straight, queer, partnered, single, monogamous, poly—but those boxes don’t hold the full truth of who we are. What if we stopped trying to fit and simply started feeling? What if we trusted our turn-ons, our longings, our quiet knowing?

You don’t need to have it all figured out. You don’t need a new label to justify your exploration. You just need to listen inward and follow what feels alive.

You are not too late.
You are not broken.
You are not betraying your past.

The end of a long-term relationship, especially a marriage or domestic partnership, often brings with it a specific kind of grief: one that’s not just about losing a person, but about losing the world you built with them—and the version of yourself that lived in that world.

This isn’t just a breakup. It’s a death of self.
It’s an ego death.
It’s the dark night of the soul.

Cultural messaging reinforces the idea that sex should happen quickly in relationships. From movies and TV shows that depict instant passion to dating culture that normalizes casual encounters, we are often encouraged to move fast without questioning whether deeper intimacy is developing alongside physical connection.

Sometimes it may feel that society says here is the “right” way to be in a relationship and here is the “wrong” way. As an online sex therapist, let me assure you that every relationship is unique and shaped by the people involved and the kind of connection they seek. There is no single “right” way to be in a relationship, only what feels right for you.

Sometimes it may feel that society says here is the “right” way to be in a relationship and here is the “wrong” way. As an online sex therapist, let me assure you that every relationship is unique and shaped by the people involved and the kind of connection they seek. There is no single “right” way to be in a relationship, only what feels right for you.

You can read more about tantra here but for couples therapy and in my couples coaching programs, I emphasize that it’s about the integration and harmonization of polarities and opposites. This involves recognizing and reconciling dualities such as light and dark, masculine and feminine, and heaven and Earth. It seeks to transcend these dualities to reach a higher state of consciousness and unity of nonduality.

What you’re doing as you eye gaze is slowing down, which can feel challenging in a society that encourages moving at warp speed. Eye gazing with yourself or another cultivates patience, listening, inquiring, and learning about the person you see in an unhurried and respectful way. All of that can lead to a healthier, more satisfying, and intimate relationship. Are you ready to try eye gazing? If so, read through my tips as an experienced online sex therapist.

During Domestic Violence Awareness Month, it’s important for everyone – not only domestic violence survivors – to understand it’s not so easy for a person to extricate themselves from an abusive situation. The reasons women stay in abusive relationships are multifaceted, involving fear, financial dependence, concern for children, emotional manipulation, hope for change, social pressures, and lack of support. Understanding these reasons is essential for developing effective interventions and support systems to help women safely exit abusive situations.

With awareness, compassion, and a willingness to confront past wounds, it is possible to overcome the fear of intimacy and embrace the vulnerability that intimacy requires. As a Marin County sex therapist, it is deeply rewarding to work with clients who move through these fears and into more fulfilling, connected relationships.

LGBTQIA+ organizations must maintain their autonomy and grassroots connections while engaging with corporate partners thoughtfully. Consumers, in turn, can support businesses that demonstrate genuine commitment to diversity and inclusion beyond Pride Month. Far too many, like Target, are fair-weather friends.

Healing doesn’t happen in isolation, however, so it’s also important to foster connections with supportive relationships and communities. Doing so can provide validation, understanding, and a sense of belonging, which are essential components of healing from trauma.

The key to a more intimate sex life is open communication, mutual respect, and a willingness to explore and connect with your partner on multiple levels. It's important to understand each other's needs and desires and to create an environment that encourages trust and vulnerability. 

Identifying the traits of an emotionally available person can help you assess a potential or current partner and also demonstrate where either or both of you could use some support. Emotional availability is a spectrum whereby some people are more available than others. In other words, every person can become more emotionally available, if they choose. And if they do, I bet they’ll find deeper and more meaningful connections.