Blog and Articles
A new blog, on average, is published about 3-8x a month, tending to offer ideas and perspectives on psychological aspects of current events, an introduction or deepening of how Dr. Denise Renye works with people, and some practices you can do blending psychology, sexology, spirituality, embodiment and art.
Press publications and mentions can be found here.
Notice to readers
These articles are not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, medical treatment, coaching or therapy. Seeking the advice of your physician or qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding any mental health symptom or medical condition is imperative. Do not disregard professional psychological or medical advice. Do not delay in the seeking of professional advice or treatment because of something you have read here.
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What It’s Like to Have Secure Attachment
This is the biggest hallmark of secure attachment – feeling a sense of ease, peace, and comfort. They trust that when they text someone, the person will get back to them in a reasonable timeframe. And if the person doesn’t, someone with secure attachment doesn’t spin out into worry or make it about them. They might think, “So-and-so must be busy, oh well,” and move on with their life.
How Technology Can Be an Avoidant Tactic in Romantic Relationships
Presence requires slowing down enough to notice what is happening inside and between you and your partner. That can feel uncomfortable. When conflict arises, when intimacy deepens, or when needs are unmet, being present might stir fear of rejection, shame, or inadequacy. Picking up a phone or turning to a screen can feel safer than leaning into the discomfort of real connection.
What it’s Like to Have Avoidant Attachment and How to Heal
What happens in the nervous system of someone with avoidant attachment is they register intimacy as dangerous. They may think to themselves either consciously or unconsciously, “If this person gets too close, I’ll disappear…I’ll get swallowed up and lose myself. There will be none of me left.” That feels terrifying and so their survival mechanism kicks in. They respond the same way as if they ran into a physical threat like a rattlesnake: They fight, retreat, or freeze. For emotional threats, this looks like picking fights with people, criticizing them, going silent/ghosting them, or shutting down through passive aggression or stonewalling.
What It’s Like to Date Someone with Disorganized Attachment
Recurring emotions when dating someone with disorganized attachment may be fear, frustration, and confusion. Fear that they’ll pull away. Frustration that no matter what you do, you can’t get them to stay present. And confusion because sometimes the person with disorganized attachment is present and available.
Disorganized Attachment: Understanding the Push-Pull of Love and Fear
Outside of therapy, what helps heal disorganized attachment is cultivating relationships with people who are consistent, patient, and trustworthy. This includes slowly tolerating intimacy and connection without panic or withdrawal. Specifically, it means gradually learning to stay present even when feelings of fear, vulnerability, or anxiety arise. Over time, the person can experience closeness without automatically pulling away or acting out, allowing the nervous system to register safety. This gradual process helps build confidence in relationships and strengthens the capacity for secure, stable bonds.